Aug. 19, 2009

madilim... tahimik... kahol ng aso mula sa kapitbahay... bukas na electricfan... pesteng lamok...

Delikado!

haaayyy... bat ba ganito? hmmm... pilitin man umiwas pero d ko magawa, ganito na lng ba lagi? hirap ng ganito ok ngaun tas bukas indi nnman kakabaliw. Ayaw ko masanay ng ganito un pakiramdam, bka hndi na ako sumaya. bahala na, darkside na ba? bahala na. Kung may magagawa lng ako para sumaya lahat ng tao gagawin ko pra wala ng malulungkot. Gusto ko ng sumaya un tulad ng dati, araw araw na masigla at puno ng saya. ngaun eh kada pag mulat ng mata haaayyy... tingin sa salamin at sasabihin na hay buhay... Sa lahat ng napag daanan ko eh parang gusto ko ng sumuko pero alam ko na may maganda din mangyayari sa akin. hintay na lng ako, sna pag gising ko mamaya batid ko na un saya at ligaya na hinahangad ko. kung may mabilis lng na paraan upang mkausad lng ako gagawin ko. ayaw ko din abusuhin ang kalusugan ko lagi puyat at wala sa oras kumain. susubukan kong iayos ang buhay ko, sobra jackass na kc rubbish and wala direksyon. d nman ako ganito dati eh, ang dating arjay eh un masayahin at makulit. ngaun lahat kabalitaran, anu bang klaseng solusyon ang kailangan ko? kala lng nila ok pa ako pero hindi, unti unti na ako na nawawalan ng direksyon tamad na sa buhay. hintay ko na lng un araw na wala na akong nararamdaman, tahimik at malaya na. Masyadong sineryoso ko kc ang buhay dati kc un ang dapat at tama pero ngaun bahala na. kung saan mapadpad dun na ako, basta masaya at hindi ako masasaktan. d na nga me nalalasing wala na epekto maski yta un alak sumuko na, nwala na ako sa hulog pilit man iayos ang hirap konti na lng bibigay na. masaya ang mabuhay! kaso kung lagi nman ganito ay mas mabuti pang huminto na ang oras upang hindi na madagdagan ng kalungkutan. dead end...

Everything That Once Was Right Is Wrong

A wonderful experience! Now It's over.
The Life And Times of mine.

3220

My 3220, Lost in space. =(

Mood Swings

Mood swings?! I'm kinda troubled with my self right now. Cant understand my vague mind is it because I think too much or just full of rubbish in me. I always make her feel down and sad even make her cry at times. Anyways... Writing is not my way or an exit nor escape to solve my problems. It's kinda helping me in a way releasing what i feel and what I'm thinking of. QUIT! that's the word right now what runs inside my hopeless brain. I'm not a quitter or gives up that easily. But maybe just maybe it has a clinch to my poor brain, I ended up chatting with a special person that i dint want to loose or give up to. It's a shame to admit that me myself cant find the right words or the answers to my silly questions. It's like a ghost in me. Hopefully this summer would be a lot different and much more extra exciting. Feels something good in the air is coming, I'm the villain right now. I talked too much that my stupid mouth puts me in trouble. I'm really sorry for my actions this past few days. Hope you can understand my unstable brain. I always nod most of the times and say what will happen next. I know I'm pushing you through walls again. So right now I think It's best for me just to shut up and let the good times roll. No more tears for you, just that beautiful smile that once stole my cold heart. Simple plain and full of love. 2:42am I'm still awake, I pause for awhile and listen to the quiet world. Some are sleeping, some are having fun, the graveyard shift as always are present the good and the bad ones HEHE and I'm in front of my computer. I want to drink something just to loosen up yet I'm not in the mood. What to do? think think think... then a flat line comes along toootttt DEAD AIR. whew! Hard to explain. I don't want to be lonely I just want to be alone. Stick to the plan! That's all I have to do. Oh well I need to sleep even though I'm not in the mood for it. like cheating! lying down, closed eyes yet not really asleep. If only... If only... There's nothing left to lose! I assume ZEN is waiting for me, the usual insomniac list on the double shuffle full charge till the morning comes the sun king waits ( It's a routine) My Sunshine at 8am! je t'aime bisous!


-True Love Waits-

V E S P E R

Who put this bodies between us?
Can we be loyal to one's shadow?
Its like a loop that last forever.
Nothing good is real.
We could be replaced anytime.
Gonna get what you deserve.
Ending start.
Reverse delay!

Lyrics that caught my attention, the passion in song writing which intrigues me the style and dedication. Is it best for a lyricist or a composer to feel and experience what the piece is all about. Some say yes, other say maybe, some say just use your colorful imagination. Yet parts of the lines that I've picked are not that colorful, In my opinion Its catchy, twangy and scary. Do you agree? It has this certain thrill in me that makes me wanna wait for that verse, stanza our the chorus and just sing it in the top of my lungs just like waiting for an air crash to happen. Like a vesper ambiance or a vesper drink it has to be perfect. cheers!

Alumni 67'

Huling araw ng pebrero hindi ko inaasahan magiging masaya ako at magpaparty sa Alumni 67' hehehe... secret un kung saan. =P masarap na pagkain at pormal na outfit kahit labag sa loob ko eh sumabak ako dahil sa isang tao. Hi! musta na pla sau! =) ibat - ibang tao ang nakasalamuha ko pati si Mayor Lim nandun at c Michael V ang host bonggang bonggang bong bong hehehe. salamat sa mga pulis pangkalawakan at natuwa naman sila nun ako'y makita nila. galing magsayaw ni mam pulis at si sir pulis ayaw matinag sa upuan hehehe... ngaun alam ko na kung saan nagmana si pare ko, sa husay at sa indak kopyang kopya hala sayaw to the max eh pati kembot at looks kuhang kuha at ayaw pa umuwi parang si pare ko mangatwiran. hekhek. ganda ng mga tinugtog ng banda simula 70's - 80's up to 90's para silang JUKEBOX lahat ng dance step nakita ko dun yun swing, boogie, chacha at yun ewan anu ba tawag dun basta kakaiba eh.haha! lahat sila masaya may mainitin ang ulo at pikon meron din naman ingles ng ingles hindi mo naman kilala haha! Sa halip nakalimutan ko na natapos ang party mag 1am na tas saka ko naalala na napaka importante pala ng araw na yun sa buhay ko, PRIMERO UNO! astig yun! Sana nagustuhan nyo ang munting regalo ko sa inyo. Simple ngunit galing sa puso. hanggang ngayon pag naaalala ko yun araw na yun ay napapa ngiti ako at napapa DANCE DANCE kaso old school eh pero ok lng music pa din at katuwaan. Paborito ko na yun kanta na BUS STOP hindi ko alam kung sino un kumanta pero ang sarap pakinggan kahit hindi ako marunong sumayaw eh napapa indak nito ang aking paa at kamat sabay ng ulo. Mahirap man iexplain basta masaya ako, sana marami pang Alumni event hehehe este mga masasayang okasyon ang dumating at maging parte ako nito. Saya eh! All Good! Good Vibes at swabe sa aksyon. haaaaa... antok na ako, yari nanaman ako nito kasi puyat ako. hehehe.... SOWEE =) Tamang timing at tyempo lang diba! sabayayan ang tunog at ang agos ng buhay. mahiya man tayo alam natin ang totoo sa bawat isa, =) ISMAYL lagi ha. ( sabay kanta ng I LOVE YOU MORE TODAY THAN YESTERDAY... ) hehehe hang over pa ako sayo.=P